athankyouverymuch

I'd like to personally thank Christopher Columbus for blindly sailing to India to find salt and this is what he got instead.

C-man,

We share a love of salt and this great land, so thank you.

Love always,
me

What? You want more? Ok. Well, thanks to Ol' Chrissy I am leaving for the day, how's that? AND, I'm gonna go home and eat bon-bons and stare at my walls for a couple of hours. Is that enough? Maybe do my nails? No? Ok, well, at some point I'm gonna have to clean up the oatmeal that is all over my microwave cause I cooked it for mmmm? approximately 8 minutes longer than necessary this morning before I realized what was happening. And, my toilet could use a good scrub, but let's be honest, that's not happening today. The bon-bons, I mean. I don't even know what a bon is, let alone multiple bons.

You know what is happening today?

A second interview is what.

Dear me,
Buenos suerte!
Love always,
me

PS You're fly is undone.

Dear me,
WHAT? How emBARRASSING! But thanks for the luck, that's awful sweet of you.
Sincerely,
me

Dear me,
Yeah, of course, I mean, XYZ. Xamine Your Zipper, like, duh ok?
Whateve,
me

Dear me,
You're a real jerk, there's a nice way to say it, you know.
-m


Dear m,
You should have titled this post "You know you've lost it when..."
Weirdo,
me